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Archive for June, 2006

bilbylane.jpg

Is it me, or is there something just mildly amusing about this sign?

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Aye Eye, Captain

Being lazy, I always go for the easiest pronunciation of something, which is difficult when you find yourself saying words such as Bremsstrahlung, so I don’t understand why some people go for the long drawn out aye instead of plain old i (as in ‘Dan is a prick.’)

Aye-rack and ant-eye are examples, although, ant-eye gets a dinner-pass from teacher because whilst some people may have an Aunty Social, she probably isn’t.

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In Your Eye

Sports terms.

They're so enlightening. So overused. So curiously appropriate.

In basketball, we refer to shooting and hitting a three-point shot while someone guards you closely, "Popping a three in your eye."

You can also "blind them."

Or "light them up."

You can also "flush" the ball when you dunk it. Or "yoke" it.

Put a good move on someone and you might (though not literally) "break their ankles."

"Splash." "Tickle the twine." "Nothing but the bottom of the net." All ways to describe a shot that goes perfectly through the hoop.

They just never seem to end.

Baseball is famous for this.

"Did you get to second base with her."

"Way to step up to the plate and get that deal done, Bob."

"Boy, they sure threw me a curveball with that proposal."

"Three strikes and you're out. You're sentenced to life in prison."

Why is it that these resonate with us so much? 

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(In The End)

At the end of the day, it's night…or tomorrow even.

Nothing else.

(I'm just as guilty) 

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Mind How You Go

A lot of villages have signs up just as you enter, telling you, "Please drive carefully."

What you don't see often is a sign on the other side of the village thanking you for driving carefully.

Is this because thanking you for driving carefully through the village implies that you can do whatever the hell you want once you're back on the open road? 

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Hot ‘n’ Humid

Sorry for the lack of posts. It's just that I can be…even more lazy than usual when we get our nine days of annual unbearably hot weather.

We're ready for a good thunderstorm. Some neighbouring regions've had them already (lucky bastards) but oh no, not here.

Here're three words somtimes used to describe hot and humid weather; the last one I just don't get at all.

  1. Clammy
  2. Close
  3. Muggy

Now Clammy I understand. Kind of hot and sweaty.

Close is fairly easy; just means heavy and airless.

But what the hell is 'muggy'?

I got almost got mugged in the subway (underpass rather than that dreadful sandwich shop) once but I can run fast…or at least I could at the time. But it wasn't hot and humid.

A dictionary tells us the word's from dialect: mug drizzle. But that still doesn't tell us anything about humidity or heat.

Answers.com tells us :

"Warm and extremely humid.

[Probably from Middle English mugen, to drizzle; akin to Old Norse mugga, a drizzle.]"

Still, I reckon it's far better to dismiss all three off those and simply say, "I'm sweating my bollocks off."

Of course, women can't say this and should replace the word 'bollocks' with 'tits'.

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When we talk about writing letters, us Brits have a certain…overly long way about asking people to send us mail:

“Send a letter to me.”

“Write me a letter.”

Whereas some other nations are somewhat more economic with words:

“Write me.”

Call me old fashioned but I like the long-winded approach:

“Go forth and reproduce” is sometimes a better way of saying “Fuck off.”

But then, this is where I get incongruent…because it can be just as good to say “Go forth” and leave it at that…well, you could add the middle finger in just for good measure. After all, body language is just as important.

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