So, it’s almost that time of week again: Shopping Day
Don’t you just hate these shopping trolleys. No? You must be a woman then.
Us men can drive cars better than women. But when it comes to steering shopping trolleys, ladies hold the upper hand every time, I’ll grant you that. I just find that they have a mind of their own…the trolleys…and women…
You can tell a lot about a person from the contents of their trolley and the aisles they shop in.
We’re passing the fruit and vegetable aisle now…we don’t use that one. Fresh meat? Too much preperation and long cooking time involved; we’ll skip that one as well.
Toiletries? Okay, some stuff from here. Beer and Spirits? Best stop here and load up. I’m not a big drinker, you understand. As a matter of fact I’m just 5′ 10″ and weigh in at just 11.5 stone. But it’s important to have some beer, wine and spirits in for guests.
It’s great how they have signs above the entrance to each aisle so you can find what you want easily.
Here’s our favourite aisle, my good friends: Pierce and Ping
But wait, some of you might not know what that is. Something to do with tattoo parlours and a ball game, perhaps?
No. This is the aisle for people who are in one or more of the following categories:
- Fast living.
- Have no cooking abilities.
- Were left in debt by a credit-card-zombie-fiancee and can’t afford good food…and still feel bitter sometimes when it’s late at night and they have the munchies and even the fridge is hungry.
So, why Pierce and Ping?
Well, if you don’t know and haven’t guessed, Pierce and Ping is that pre-packed, processed, meal-for-one stuff that has high salt content; you remove the tray from the box, pierce the lid, microwave the tray and contents, then when you hear the ping, you know it’s time to eat.
Basically, TV dinners.
Right, here we are, at the checkout.