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Archive for August, 2005

A Long Time

Ay up chap, I haven’t seen you for yonks.

Yonks: an interesting word nobody seems to know the origins of but has been in use in these parts for a long time.

Here’s a link to speculations of its origins:

http://www.worldwidewords.org/qa/qa-yon1.htm

Funny, how we use words when we know what they mean but don’t know where they come from.

We could say: eons; ages; an eternity;

It’s easy to find the origins of these words.

So, you got anything to teach us?

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Only For The Office

For those of us who might work among a sea of cubicles and work for Lumbergh (or have the movie “Office Space” memorized)…

“Having a salmon day.” — You swim upstream the whole time, only to get screwed in the end.

“Prairie dogging.” — When everybody hears something and pops their heads over the top of their cubicles.

“Crop dusting.” — Ripping gas as you walk by and watching everybody prairie dogging trying to figure out who did it.

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The Full Gamut

There seem to be these words that are used for one purpose and one purpose only.

Take the phrase “high-strung,” to describe someone who’s constantly in a state of agitation.

So, if someone isn’t “high-strung,” would they then be “low-strung?”

We use the term only in one sense. In many ways, it works, because it’s the best way to describe what you’re trying to say.

Another phrase is “runs the full gamut.”

This is big in government/corporate speak. It’s a way of saying there is a wide range of points something touches on.

The word “gamut” means, basically, a color spectrum.

Do we use the word “gamut” in any other sense? Not really. But guys who really have no idea what a “gamut” is use this phrase repeatedly.

We also call the bathroom on an airplane a “lavatory,” but we don’t go take a crap in “lavatories” at home.

This phenomenon surely runs the full gamut.

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It’s all for show.

Eric, my partner in crime, the brains of the operation, the one who won’t get arrested, wrote in the dawn of creation, okay, the birth of this blog, that language is an ever flowing river or something similar. I did look in the archives, but not too hard. Whatever he wrote was correctamundo.

Will our interest in language ever change? I speak for Eric here, but the answer is negatory.

Whilst talking about language may not be gnarly or rad, we can’t avoid using it.

Mobile phone (cell phone, if you like) technology has changed things further. The advent of the internet and email was a start of things, but this SMS texting bollocks is ‘doing my head in.’

Friends send me messages and I just end up calling them because for all I know they could be saying that I shave my gonads with a cheese grater. I actually think this is a conspiracy so I run up a bill and they don’t. See what good friends I have?

Older readers, and younger ones who watch repeats of old TV shows while eating highly nutritious convenience food, will be familiar with a couple of words I used earlier: correctamundo and negatory. TV shows have been responsible for a lot of language changes. Perhaps not the actual creation of words, but certainly the spread of them.

More recent productions, and you’ll have to excuse me here as we get American shows about a year or so after they’ve aired in the States, such as Dark Angel and Malcolm in the Middle are responsible for bringing new words to Britain.

Another source of education for me is MTV.

I wonder how quickly or slowly language would change were it not for modern media.

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Leonardo

n. An annoying little turd that refuses to go down the pan after the main dreadnought has sunk.

Named after the the actor who annoyingly floated around, refusing to die quickly at the end of the film Titanic.

Taken from the new Roger’s Profanisaurus.

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There are many ways of expressing surprise.

Recently I was asked what I meant when I said ‘fucking spiders’ for no immediately obvious reason. I’ve no idea what the origins of this exclamation are but would hazard a guess that it has something to do with the surprise of seeing spiders copulating (a rare sight) or just the horror of seeing spiders. I’m kind of in love with the former idea. It’s just something I heard whilst growing up and have continued to use…because of my limited vocabulary.

Let’s think up some new ideas, or at least educate each other about different exclamations. I wonder what they say in different parts of the world.

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Gizzer bin lid = Hey man, can you lend me a buck?

Or is it?

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