Grrrrr

When something’s not working we tend to say it’s ‘out of order’. You might even have friends who are sometimes out of order, or you could be out of order yourself. I’m sometimes out of order.
But back to the point, it bugs me something chronic when my computer is ‘on the blink’ and I get [...]

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Bums Up

Don’t you find it weird how people raise a glass of wine or brandy when in fact they should be raising a slice of toast? I’d like to know where ‘raise a toast’ comes from and exactly what it means.
In North America it’s popular to say bottom’s up. The Scottish say ’slangeva’ (forgive me my [...]

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It’s about as much use as…

…a johnny with a hole in it.
…a chocolate fireguard.
…twenty Marlboro and no light.
…wet toilet paper.
Darren’s email client was about as much use as a johnny with a hole in it. i.e. something got sent where it shouldn’t have. But then that’d probably be Darren’s fault so perhaps it’s him that’s like a holed [...]

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Equality for the ladies.

There are loads of synonyms for the word ‘man’: bloke, dude, fella, guy.
But what about the word “woman?”
There’s “sheila” from Australian Slang, which is a way of referring to any woman: go and ask that sheila over there.
And, of course, in the contemporary American urban culture we have “shorty” and “boo” — though “boo” might [...]

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Chunder Bunny

You’ll find them in any town or city where alcohol is sold, especially at weekends.
They’re interesting creatures to watch. And it’s surprising there hasn’t been a nature film made about them.
They imbibe. They imbibe beyond both contentment and capacity. Their stomachs churn. Their bodies reject further intake. They puke, chunder, spew, barf.
The production of pavement [...]

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Mad as a Hatter?

You know those situations where you’re in a public place, say a cafe or on a bus even, and some complete nutter comes in or gets on board and starts asking if anyone has seen his camel lately.
It’s usually worse if you’re on your own. ‘Don’t come and sit near me for f**k’s sake,’ [...]

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Soooo Gay

The word “gay” is a tricky one.
At its root, and originally, it means to be happy.
The most-common usage has morphed to refer to someone who is homosexual.
Now, among the youth of today, “gay” has transformed again into a term used to describe something “cheesy” or “crusty” or, in other words, “not cool.” In actuality, it [...]

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Fooling Folk

We’ve all done it from time to time. Some of us do it on a regular basis. It’s an art form. But what colourful ways do you have of describing it?
Here, it’s known as blagging it. You can blag your way into private events. You might have blagged your way through [...]

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Language is a funny thing. Both funny peculiar and funny amusing. You’ll probably laugh at this, but it’s okay. Until recently, a certain person thought etymology was a hospital department. Sounds like one doesn’t it? “We’ve got to get him down to etymology!” the doctor shouted.
It’s curious how our brains come [...]

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